Un nuevo comienzo

Mayo ha sido un mes bastante bueno para mi a pesar que es el primer aniversario que mi papa fallecio, sobretodo esta ultima semana fue algo fantastico.

1.- Por fin me decidi a ir con una nutriologa, he estado subiendo de peso y quiero hacer algo por mi, por mi salud, mañana cumplo dos semanas de la dieta, cada semana voy con la doctora, en la primera semana llevo perdidos 1 kilo y 2 cm de cintura, ahi la llevamos, el Lunes me toca ir otra vez con la doctora, veremos que tanto he perdido.

2.- Tengo planeado graduarme de la preparatoria abierta este Septiembre que viene, para mi se me ha dificultado mucho las matematicas, con la ayuda de mi hermanita chula y mi maestra he estado ganando terreno y les estoy entendiendo mas, eso me da muchisimo gusto.

3.- Todo el mes mi jefe inmediato casi no ha ido a trabajar (fueron contados los dias) y lo he estado supliendo, ha sido bastante pesado, ha sido mucho estress y trabajo, pero el Jueves pasado el Gerente me llamo y me felicito por haber hecho un buen trabajo, me quede muy sorprendida ya que nunca me lo habian dicho... pero, donde mas MAS me sorprendio y tuve un muy bonito sentimiento fue ayer, me mando llamar la contadora y me comento que estaba haciendo un MUY buen trabajo, que estaban satisfechos por lo que he estado haciendo, llegaron los aumentos para la empreza y me empezo a decir que eran del 4 al 5% (yo dije... ya no fue un buen aumento otro año mas) pero como les gusta mi actutud, mi trabajo y vieron cuales son mis aptitudes me subieron un 7.15% de salario (wow!) estoy MUY feliz y satisfecha por eso!!!

4.- Logre conseguir un trabajo en Second Life donde me pagan un salario, de ahi voy a poder ahorrar y pagar mis deudas, me gusta mucho trabajar ahi! Es un muy buen grupo de amigas!

Como ves, este mes fueron muchos logros y cambios, estoy feliz y ya quiero que sea la segunda semana de Junio para poder ya descansar una semana que lo necesito y bastante.

Memories

I have found this on Facebook and I think it clearly tells how I feel. It's almost going to be a year and some sad feelings that were gone are coming back...

I wish Heaven had a phone so I could hear your voice again.. I thought of you today, but that is nothing new. I thought about you yesterday, and days before that too. I think of you in silence, I often speak your name. All I have are memories and a picture in a frame. Your memory is a keepsake, from which ill never part. God has you in his arms.. I have you in my heart

Thoughts

All this year has been really a roller coaster ride for me, good times, happy times, but it's almost a year since he's gone and I am still hurting too much.

I must admit I don't cry so often, but there is no night when I can't stop thinking about him and how much I miss him. People have been telling me that writing my feelings will work to get it all out and I will feel better.. I still haven't been able to do that since it makes me cry every time I try to talk about it.

Sometimes I feel like I'm very childish for still crying and still feeling bad, but I just haven't found the answer yet, how can you get used to live without your best friend whom you've lived with for 41 years? I still haven't found the answer to that.

I've been dreaming about him, and sometimes it has been helping me feel a bit better.
I even dreamed about him on Xmas Eve, I dreamed that I was in the dining room sitting with him, mom was cooking and I saw him, he was looking at me smiling he asked for a kiss pointing at his cheek the way he used to, I kissed him and I did not feel anything, so I saw him and asked me again to give him a kiss, the second time I kissed him and hugged him, I told him how much I missed him and how much I loved him, he smiled at me and then mom came and he was gone... I woke up and cried....

Some say "let him go, let him go" but I just don't know how to "let go" someone I miss and love very much.

I'm in a "game" called Second Life, my dad introduced me to it, when he passed away I donated some of his lindens to the American Cancer Society in Second LIfe, they have been helping me through the year and now, for the first time my partner and me will be doing a fund raiser party for the American Cancer Society, I want to give back something of what they have done for me and all the friends I have found. I hope we can raise a lot of money for them.

Anyway, I will try (but don't hold your breath!) and "talk" about this, maybe it will help me in the long run, maybe not, who knows?